The following review of Fifty Shades of Greycontains graphic language and descriptions of sex. It is a review of an erotic novel, after all. Do not read this if you will be offended.

Additionally, this review is only meant for those who may be under the misapprehension that there is any literary merit to this book. If you understand and enjoy that it is pornography, and therefore not worth critiquing, then you need read no further. We already agree.

However, if you have been told it is actually a “good book” or is interesting in any way, let this serve as a warning.

This review contains many spoilers.

This review has been prepared by myself and my friends Ellie and Emily. For context and perspective, we are Canadian, in our twenties, and our day jobs are in communications.

Characters

It seems appropriate to start with what…