As subtle as a flying brick.

Posts tagged “McDonald

McDonalds can Eat a Dick – Part III

Well, I got what I wanted from McDonald’s, and now, my ass is about to explode in righteous fury!
But the point is, I got what was mine! so what if I have to spend the night on the toilet.


McDonalds can Eat a Dick – Part II

So.. Today I’m going to go back and have a little talk with Marty and see if I can get that meal I was promised.
I’d best come away from this little pow-wow with a meal in my hands, because if not, I’m going to lose it I think. I’ll let you know how it went.


McDonalds can Eat a Dick – Part I

So we went to McDonald’s for a very rare outing (I don’t eat that shit much anymore, too evil for you.) and we got our food, I got this chicken thing. So we get home, and find out that when I checked the bags at the drive through, I didn’t do as good a job as I had thought. I got 2 chicken fajita (fa-gee-ta) instead of a chicken sandwich, so I quickly call back McDonald’s to point out the little mistake, they make it sound like my fault, but tell me that I can have a free meal on them for the mistake (not their mistake, “THE” mistake). OK, So I was a little cheesed off about that but I let it slip, they’re busy and shit.

At 9:00-ish Jenn & I head back up to grab my free meal, because quite frankly 2 fajita the size of a child’s thumb don’t quite fill a 6’4 215lb man’s stomach. We get there, and I talk to the same guy who I’d talked to on the phone “Marty”.

Marty is a fucking moron.

Marty proceeds to tell me that I didn’t call him, I’m a liar, there’s nothing he can do, and that I’ll have to pay for another meal. I tell dear sweet idiotic Marty, that I’ve already paid for the meal, I called him (I recited our phone conversation word for word), and there is no way I’m paying for a stupid fucking meal twice, Oh and I also inferred that he could “eat a dick“.

So, I get out, tell Jenn this, and proceed to drive home, thinking “well, maybe I did fuck up, and Marty isn’t a fucking moron”. When we get home, I check my phone log, and lo-and-behold, I’m fucking right for a change. So I call the number back, and pass the phone to Jenn.

For those who don’t know Jenn, do not piss her off.

Jenn talks to the moron very calmly, and explains the situation, and when he starts to imply that she’s lying to him, she gets a little intense πŸ™‚

She describes the chick who gave us the burger, the time we were there, that they log everything, the amount we paid, etc. He still doesn’t get it, and says that we didn’t call.

Eventually after beating the poor sap down, he says OK. If you can bring me the fajita I’ll trade you for the sandwich. (I ate the fucking fajita, and he can eat a dick). She tells him, that we threw them out (which we did, out of my ass). So he tells her “root around in there than and find them”. Hah, “they’re in the basement, we live in an apartment complex, and our garbage is gone”.

At this he just gives up, and says ‘OK, you can have a burger’. Well fucking Thank you for giving me what I paid for, I appreciate it.

Jenn Rocks

Why when fucking idiots fuck up, do they try to blame it on you? I mean, what ever happened to the old saying ‘the customer is always right’. When did it change to ‘fuck you, give me your money, and you might get what you want’.

Seriously, fuck you McDonald’s for your poor teaching methods, and hiring methods. Fucking teach these monkeys to not make the customer (The one who pays your damn salary’s) want to fucking knock your asshole Managers out.

I’m a nice calm person, but I don’t take monkeys calling me a liar well πŸ™‚

I’m glad I have Jenn, she can seriously kick some ass with the monkeys, while my idea is to just beat on them.